Deadliest Warrior (2010): S02E08 – Somali Pirate vs. Medellin Cartel


Introduction

Deadliest Warrior is a 2009 documentary series in which the great warriors of history are examined for fantasy combat simulations.

Outline

Somali Pirate, the modern day bucheneers of the East Africa Coast, vs. the Mendellin Cartel, the Columbian drug gang responsible for the most widespread distribution of narcotics in the Americas.

  • Somali Pirate team: Abdi Ali (Somali Native/Army Veteran), Haji Ukajh (Somali Refugee/Weapons Expert)
    Somali Pirate weapons: Grappling Hook, AK-47, PKM Machine Gun, RPG-7
    Somali Pirate armour: None
  • Medellin Cartel team: Michael Corleone Blanco (Son of Medellin Cartel Boss), Kenny “Kenji” Gallo (Former Cocaine Smuggler)
    Medellin Cartel weapons: Machete, Mini Uzi, M60 Machine Gun, Car Bomb
    Medellin Cartel armour: None
  • For short-range weapons, the machete was tested against the grappling hook. The machete cleaved off the arms and severed the throat of a gel torso as well as demonstrated the Colombian necktie, while the grappling hook ripped into a pig carcass. The edge was given to the machete since the grappling hook was not designed to be a weapon and can cause damage to the user.
  • For mid-range weapons, the Mini Uzi was tested against the AK-47. The Mini Uzi emptied an entire magazine into two targets inside a car with most of the hits being in the head and neck areas while the AK-47 killed two targets at 50yds and two targets at 100yds while fired from a small skiff. The edge was given to the AK-47 for its longer range and firepower.
  • For long-range weapons, the M60 was tested against the PKM in eliminating four moving targets. The PKM completed the test in 1m and 43s but jammed once while the M60 completed the test in 1m and 54s but jammed twice. The edge was given to the PKM for its higher rate of fire and better mechanical reliability.
  • For explosive weapons, the car bomb was tested against the RPG-7. Although the RPG-7 was portable and could be fired repeatedly at a distance, the edge was given to the car bomb for its better chance at killing multiple targets with its larger explosive payload.
  • This is the third squad on squad battle that featured four on four instead of the traditional five on five.
  • This is the first battle where a combatant eliminates himself and an opponent in a suicide (Pablo Escobar, who is wounded, detonates a Car Bomb, killing himself and the leader of the Somali Pirates).
  • The Somali Pirates are the sixth of thirteen warriors to win after scoring more kills at mid range and long range.
  • The car-bomb is the twelfth weapon to be given the edge and score fewer kills than the opposing weapon.

Re-enactment 16

The battle starts with a group of Somali Pirates approaching a warehouse near a pier via motor boat. Inside the warehouse, Pablo Escobar and one of the Medellín Drug Cartel thugs are preparing packages of cocaine while a third member practices swinging his machete and a fourth dances to salsa music while holding an M60 machine gun. Outside, the Somali Pirates dock their boat and swarm on shore towards the warehouse. The head Pirate, armed with an AK-47, and two of his men, armed with a PKM Machine Gun and grappling hook, enter the warehouse while a fourth stays behind, shouldering his RPG-7 rocket launcher. Inside, they see the Cartel men relaxing and Escobar giving one of them a package of cocaine. As the thug goes to put it away, the PKM pirate jumps out and kills him with the machine gun. Escobar, alerted to the gunfire, grabs an Uzi while the dancing thug holds out his M60 machine gun and fires back. In the shadows, the other Cartel thug with the machete tries to sneak up on one of the Somali Pirates while they are distracted by the gunfire. The hook Pirate spots him as he charges and tries to fight back with his Grappling Hook. He parries the oncoming swing and hits the Cartel thug in his stomach. The thug counters in response by amputating the Pirate’s hand and then slashing his neck. The lead Somali Pirate hears the commotion and turns and kills the Cartel man with his AK-47 with a single shot to the face. The other Cartel henchman continues to fire his M60, but it gets jammed. He drops it and picks up an Uzi. Both he and Pablo Escobar try to make a run for it. The PKM Pirate tries to shoot Escobar, but misses. The head Pirate signals for him to run after the remaining Cartel members. Escobar runs down stairs, and turns around when he hears the Pirate leader chasing him. The Pirate takes cover behind a corner, and the two begin to exchange gunfire. The Somali Pirate eventually manages to shoot Escobar in the left shoulder, who falls to the floor and lies motionless. The Pirate steps on him as he comes down the stairs and takes his cigar and smokes it in satisfaction. Meanwhile, the other Cartel member climbs up stairs and enters a room. When the other Somali Pirate opens the door, the Cartel thug opens fire with his Uzi and kills him. He sneers at the dead body and spits on it. Meanwhile, the head Pirate sees a car with cocaine and a bag of money. He gets in the driver’s seat and begins honking the horn to get the rocket Pirate who chose to stay outside. He hears the horn and makes his way toward the garage. However, the head Pirate is unaware that Pablo Escobar, who is behind the car, is still alive. Escobar struggles to get up, but his wounds are so bad that he cannot. He sees the Pirate in the car and pulls out a remote. He sets himself up with his remaining strength and looks under the car, where a bomb is situated. Realizing that he has no other options, he presses the button on the remote as the other Pirate approaches the garage. The bomb goes off, destroying the car and killing both Escobar and the head Pirate while sending the last Pirate to the asphalt. The last Cartel member hears the explosion and runs for an exit. The Somali Pirate sits up and starts to clean off the debris when he sees the last Cartel member exiting from a door. He stands up and prepares his RPG-7 Rocket Launcher. The Cartel member sees him and desperately tries to go back inside, only to find that the door is locked from the inside and cannot be opened. The Pirate fires the rocket, which flies at the Cartel thug and blows up, obliterating him. The remaining Pirate roars in victory and walks away.

Winner: Somali Pirates.

Deadliest Warrior Series

You can find a full index and overview of Deadliest Warrior here.

Production & Filming Details

  • Release Date: 08 June 2010.
  • Rating: Unknown.
  • Running Time: 42 minutes.
  • Country: US.
  • Language: English.

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